It took me until Tuesday to get around to watching Batman v Superman because of my day job. I had to dodge a weekend’s worth of trash talking and spoilers. I’m glad I didn’t listen to them and saw it on the biggest screen I could. It was great. Ben Afleck is now my favorite live action Batman. Spoilers and triggering thoughts ahead… be an adult.
Why I love It
From the start. The Comedian is Thomas Wayne. Damn, I got to let that sink in. So if they explore the Flashpoint Paradox in the Snyder DC universe the Thomas Wayne version of Batman will be The Comedian. This is absolutely perfect. If you think Batfleck is heavy handed wait til you get a load of Thomas Wayne.
The Wayne’s are shown fighting back. With each breath they protect Bruce, failed punches and all. While jilted basement dwellers moan about the umpteenth rehashing of the Wayne’s death, they completely missed, that in this incarnation, Bruce witnesses his parents die while attempting to fight back. This is both a significant and a deliberate change. These Wayne’s are different and their son is different. Superman killing Zod and his lack of underwear was a signal this isn’t your 60’s Superman. Wayne’s parents fighting back was a signal this is a different Batman. This Batman is brutal… he brands his enemies brutal.
I love that this Superman has depth. I care about this Superman. He is no longer the ‘boy scout’, aka vanilla. He is twisted up inside. He has actual character and potential for a character arc or what I like to refer to as an actual story. Absolute morality hasn’t made him milk toast. I used to not care about Supes because he was predictable. Snyder’s Superman is torn and at odds with what is the actual right thing to do. Snyder’s world is fragile. This world equally hates and loves him. Superman is less of a god and more human, ergo more relatable.
It isn’t perfect. The main Batman fight sequence was puffed up with tons of CGI, shaky cam and jump cuts which seems to obscure weak choreography, however, it is a step towards how Batman fights in the comic books and in the video game and better than most on screen Batman fights. This either calls for a second viewing or I will just have to wait for the new Captain America to quench that thirst.
Now, why critics hate it.
Nolan Fan Boys
There are people online right now saying Nolan’s Batman’s were well written and deep. DEEP?!?! “Snyder’s universe is riddled with plot holes” and “Nolan’s scripts are bullet proof” they continue to moan. Nolan fan boys seem to overlook that in Dark Knight Rises the supposed world’s greatest detective was stabbed in the back by a woman he got into bed with both physically and industrially. They love Nolan to a fault so grand they are willing to hate the essence of Batman. Need I also remind you, Nolan would have you believe that Batman would retire… twice. HERESY!!
On a scale of 1 to BvS Haters, I dislike Nolan’s Batman at about a 3.
The brilliance of Inception, Memento and The Prestige are not valid arguments for Nolan’s Batman any more than Unbreakable makes up for The Last Airbender.
Batfleck, in this shared movie, used more gadgets and did more detective work than Bale did in the whole of the Nolan Batverse (if I had the time, I would verify this claim). Donate to my cause on the right and give me the opportunity.
It’s Du Jour
The Bandwagon affect is strong with this one. The circle jerk of failed script writers that love The Room hating on this movie began with the fact that Batman v Superman was critic proof from the start. Much like Transformers, BvS is a huge intellectual property with a huge budget. You can’t sink it. It can only sink itself. This is the first movie to gross over 150 million dollars and be certified rotten. The du jour hate is even spawning memes.
Rotten Tomatoes is not a great indicator on the fun factor or even the quality of a movie. It is simply a barometer for critics taste. The aforementioned, The Room, has a better rating than BvS. WHAT? Do not watch it unless you like horrible trite. Hell, Spider-Man 3 has a 65% and it is pretty damn cringey at times. You may have to put on your tin foil hats, but when a movie is unsinkable, in the studio’s eyes, why bother paying for fluff reviews? If all your budget is spent photoshoping out dick bulges you probably have no more money for the dick bulges on the internet to review your movie positively, because who needs them, this has Batman punching Superman. Is paying for a positive review so unthinkable? Is being spiteful for not receiving money for a fluff review of a big budget movie so unthinkable? Okay, no one is getting a check directly for a review, I would have to be a crazed talkbaker to think that, but how about a full banner ad on the left right and top of your website for the week preceding the movie?
What John Oliver glazes over is that the Government can, and does, engage in Native Advertising all the time, more commonly referred to as propaganda. When John jokingly wonders how HBO generates revenue, the answer is likely cable subscriptions, but, they could also be paid government stories. Watching Bill Maher, an unabashed Obama donor, or his show VICE, it is hard not to think of their product as anything other than blatant CNN like propaganda.
Maybe they don’t get paid directly but you could also look at access, like set visits, actor exclusive interviews, or premieres as a forms of payment. Of course critics will deny this harder than an Instagram fitness model denies drug use.
So what is the propaganda of hating BvS?
SJWs and 3rd Wave Feminists
The way some reviewers just casually drop the word misogynist as a descriptor for BvS. Really? The movie hates women? Why did Gal Gadot and Amy Adams agree to work with such a well known He-Man woman hater as Snyder?
Critics hate Snyder as a form of virtue signaling. Snyder made Sucker Punch. Sucker Punch is sexist according to 3rd wave feminists and Social Justice Warriors. Therefore, hating Snyder is a form of announcing one’s superior morality in an attempt at winning nonredeemable points on social media. Don’t you dare say you are fighting for muh wage gap, that idiocy has been debunked over and over and over. Tweeting you hate Sucker Punch or hating Micheal Bay for his explosion exposition of Megan Fox is like putting 10$ in the collection plate at church or dying your hair blue. Donating to the church does not open heaven’s gates, defending women capable of defending themselves does not render any moral superiority or dates, and dying your hair blue does not make you unique. But in order for them to even defend women in this manner, they must first deny Megan Fox, or any of the women in Sucker Punch, personal agency. Have they asked for help? It is up to actresses, not internet white knights, to determine if they were used in a sexist manner or not. Are the actresses in Sucker Punch so ignorant of the Patriarchy that SJWs must think for them and act on their behalf? Isn’t it up to Megan Fox to tell us if we should come to her rescue? Criticism of this manner is all a bit patronizing if you ask me, pun intended.
Many of BvS, and Snyder’s, biggest critics are vocal SJWs on many other topics, just check their twitter feed history. Whether Snyder likes it or not his taste has dragged him into the current culture war.
SJWs, Fainting Couch Feminists as Christina Hoff Summers calls them, are currently waging a war against free speech on the internet. To criticize them in a tweet is to violently harass them. They clearly never heard “sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me”. Actually, they probably did and they maliciously look past it, and the 1st Amendment, in order to accomplish their agenda.
Sucker Punch is not sexists if you think that the female body is beautiful and it is up to the woman occupying it to do with what they wish. This is better known as Sex Positive Feminism. Men should not be shamed for admiring the female body any more than women should be shamed when they desire to flaunt their physicality or use it for personal gain. Must we behave like crazed Christians and digitally apply fig leafs to all offending material? Or ban them outright? Do you want to live in the middle east, because this is how we become the middle east. If you were to believe the rhetoric of the loudest Feminists on buzzfeed these days all women should be covered head to toe in fabric. If we listened to 3rd Wave Tumblr Feminists, Gal Gadot would be overweight wearing a Wonder Woman Pantsuit. SJWs and 3rd Wave Feminists have more in common with Islam than American values like freedom of speech and personal responsibility.
Afleck Crossover Hate
Speaking of Islam, Afleck has been getting lambasted for his comments on the propaganda Bill Maher show. Sam Harris and Bill Maher are both attempting to blame Islam for violence and justifying military action overseas and Afleck simply said “not all Muslims.” Indeed, not all Muslims. When Sam Harris attempt’s to “unpack this” he is saying that at the core of Muslims world wide are extremists. Terrorists are not at the center of the Muslim faith any more than Ted Haggard or the Westboro Baptist Church are at the center of Christianity. This is simply not true. Do they and their sympathizers make up a portion of the population? Sure, but this is like saying that at the center of America we are war mongers based on the small percentage that cheer and support America’s actions over seas. A great number of American’s simply don’t care and many more are against our foreign entanglements than are for it.
War is the health of the US hegemony and Bill Maher and Sam Harris are cryptically pro war. It is a paradox. When attacking conservatives, liberals are staunchly anti-war, but as soon as they have the incumbency they jump through ridiculous mental hoops to keep the war machine chugging along else America fall apart on their watch. I applauded Afleck then, and I will today, for simply pointing out the truth. Muslims represent a large majority of the world’s population, 1.6 billion, and yet Islamic extremists occupy a microscopic percentage of that group. Death by the American war machine, however, has untold millions of casualties more than terrorist acts and in spite of the American population occupying such a small percentage, 300 million, of the world. American’s per American war machine related death is a much greater percentage than Muslims per terrorist kill. The US is much more efficient at killing civilians. By Maher’s and Harris’ logic all American citizens should answer for all tragedies committed by the Pentagon. This is where in extended discussions Harris will argue the importance of intent while simultaneously ignoring the intent and ignorance of the opponent. I am no Muslim apologist either. I feel their culture has a long way to go, just as ours. Throwing gay men from buildings and not letting women drive is as barbaric a behavior as America’s current foreign occupations.
Other Afleck hate just stems unrelated movies like Gigli and from simple jealousy as he is attractive, accomplished, and very talented, sorry Paul Rudd.
I am getting utterly sick of this crowd. Just shut up and re-watch your stupid 80’s movies over again rather than complaining that today’s movies aren’t those movies. Modern day cinematic remakes are not going to be remade the way you would make it. Nor will they be a carbon copy. Face it, your ideas suck, otherwise people would be paying you handsomely for them and not Zack Snyder. If you wanted it remade in your special snowflake way you should have gotten better at writing or directing rather than watching Real Genius or Ferris Bueller for the 100th time. Okay, now I’m projecting a little. But in all seriousness if Snyder put a giant tentacle monster in his version of Watchmen it would have looked lame as hell. Snyder did for Alan Moore what Johnny Cash did for Trent Reznor, and Alan Moore should thank Snyder similarly. We tried a Reeve’s clone in Brandon Routh, how well did that work out? Get over the fact that this movie wasn’t made with your vision of who Superman is and go to your wall of DVD’s and dust off Superman 4, do a podcast about that.
If you thought the mental hoops were rigorous for a liberal to support war, imagine being a critic who is both a Social Justice Warrior and a Nostalgia Queen, when they talk about the new Ghostbusters reboot. All their previous arguments about their childhood being ruined are now at odds with their social justice agenda. If you thought that BvS had a bizarre critic vs. fan rating on Rotten Tomatoes look at the insane down votes on the Ghostbusters trailer versus the amount of puff editorials speculating on how good it is going to be. How can something, so overwhelmingly hated by fans, be supported by the critics?
Anti 2nd Amendment
Mind you Tim Burton’s Batman killed tons of bad guys… and Nolan’s Batman did too. All their vehicles being festooned with gatling guns.
But don’t tell that to a Nolan fan boy, their excuses will have more McGuffins than a Nolan script. It is no secret that many of the people arguing the loudest on Twitter against BvS are also vocal liberals, SJWs as I have mentioned above, or what some have coined as the Regressive Left who are all very anti 2nd Amendment in addition to being anti 1st Amendment. They retweet gun grabbers after every public shooting and similarly decry that “Batman would never use a gun” and “Superman should never kill under any circumstance.” I am far from being a conservative, although many will have likely drawn that conclusion by now, but I do appreciate the necessity for good people to kill, if they, or innocent people, are at risk of being killed otherwise. These critics will tell you that the ‘good guy with a gun’ talking point is a myth, but the moment they are in trouble, they will dial 911 with the hopes that a good guy with a gun will come to their rescue.
The modern culture war and politics aside, the Supes in Man of Steel and the Bats in Batman v Superman are Snyder’s versions of Supes and Bats. I enjoy them. Just like the Superman in Red Son, is Mark Millar’s Superman, my favorite Superman story. Although I’m not a huge fan of Nolan’s Batman, I will enjoy that too from time to time. Nolan definitely nailed Batman’s origin and the Joker. If you don’t like Snyder’s version of the characters GO WATCH SOMETHING ELSE. There are even versions of Superman that can lift 200 quintillion tons, as stupid as that sounds.
I am looking forward to the totality of the Snyder DC arc. Gimme dat Justice League. Ooooh and a solo Batfleck flick of course.